12.22.2006

Wife Rearranges Furniture


Centreville, Virginia: a Centreville couple made history today when the husband came home to find his wife had rearranged the furniture for the 167th time since moving there in December 1999.

"Normally, I don't even notice the place has been rearranged until I am home for a few hours. I might go to turn on the TV and find a bookshelf in its place. Or I start to sit in my favorite chair and land on my butt because it's now on the other side of the room. But this time I noticed since it had only been a week since configuration number 166."

When asked about her proclivity to rearrange, Mrs. Harper said "I just can't seem to make things fit right in his front room. Some people collect stamps. Some do needlepoint. I rearrange."

Mrs. Harper sometimes displays almost superhuman powers when in one of her rearranging frenzies. “I don't know how I had the strength to move the couch up from the basement. Especially since it took Daniel and two other friends to get it down there in the first place. Maybe it has something to do with being four months pregnant. It's my nesting instinct I guess. “

Asked how long she might stick with the new furniture layout, Mrs. Harper gushed: "oh I finally really like the way the room looks. This is how it's going to stay for a while."

Mr. Harper then erupted in laughter.

11.27.2006

Parents Praise Child's Accomplishments As Unprecedented



Fairfax Virginia-Noah Shepard Harper stunned the experts last Saturday by earning his first stripe in his karate belt test. "No white belt, to my knowledge, has ever performed as well as my son did today" his father opined. "I watch a lot of UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship) on Spike TV and I can honestly say I think Noah could give Tito "Bad Boy" Ortiz a run for his money. Seriously."

His mother chimed in, "I'm so proud. He was a blur of punches and kicks. We're talking Tasmanian Devil here. I may have to take some self-defense classes before I send him to timeout again."

Noah now moves out of the preschool class to a new division-kindergarten. The current kindergarten division champion, Josh, was already talking trash: "it's one thing to dominate in preschool division. I mean, those guys are kids. Let's see how he does with the big boys."

Josh then excused himself to go to the potty.

Can Noah make it in the big leagues? Stay tuned.

Charitable Explanation

Note, I intend no offense to my non-church going friends-remember this article refers to averages

Nowhere is the divide in values more on display than in religion, the frontline in our so-called "culture war." And the relationship between religion and charity is nothing short of extraordinary. The Social Capital Community Benchmark Survey indicates that Americans who weekly attend a house of worship are 25 percentage points more likely to give than people who go to church rarely or never. These religious folks also give nearly four times more dollars per year than secularists, on average, and volunteer more than twice as frequently


Charitable Explanation - WSJ.com

11.06.2006



Me in my wild and crazy days, courtesy of my brother Jon's MySpace page with the caption: "So not much has changed(& I'm not talking about the beer or the smoke"

Public Service Announcement: Democrats vote Wednesday

Due to the unusually high expected voter turnout this year, public officials are asking that Republicans vote Tuesday and Democrats vote Wednesday.

Free hummus will be served at the polls and every Democratic who votes Wednesday will receive a recyclable collector's edition of Fahrenheit 911 ;)

11.03.2006

My Name is (Jonathan) Earl....



It was like a real-life episode of "My Name is Earl." I was helping my brother Jon (recently transplanted back to ol' Virginny) move into his apartment. We were figuring out hoe to secure the mattress to the top of the truck when dad suggested the twine we were planning to use was too thin..."just use this electrical cord!"

For some reason I got a real kick out of it. "Cue up the banjos! We's goin' UPTOWN!"

10.20.2006

"Homosexual" Marriage

[The following is a carryover from the debate at Pastor Neil's blog at http://www.craigan.typepad.com/]

I guess I'm having trouble understanding something...How exactly is something "mean-spirited and punitive" when all it does is positively affirm something that's been true in every society-than marriage is between a man and woman? It's not as if this law takes away some existing right of two women in a platonic relationship to live together and apply for some sort of pseudo-marriage benefits. The law does not say people of the same-sex cannot live together (whether they are heterosexual or homosexual). It just says that society will not confer some sort of special legal status on them.

Marriage is about much more than material benefits. Society confers upon marriage a special status: when we affirm the natural and God-given law that marriage is between a man and a woman, we're telling society that it is the preferred environment in which to raise children. That does not mean that it's a perfect environment, that people never get divorced, or never have affairs. It simply means that the starting point, the ideal, is for a child to have a mother and father.

One point about marriage I think some of us are missing-it was actually instituted before the fall! Some of you seem to be arguing that because we're in a fallen world we should throw all sexual mores to the wind. People commit all sorts of crimes in our broken world; we don't legalize bank robbery just because it still happens!

We started off debating the merits of this particular law, but clearly we have centered back on the core debate: should homosexuals be allowed to marry?
For that matter, why not allow two men to marry three women? Or a brother to marry his two sisters? The

The simple fact is, once you change the definition of marriage to include same-sex couples, you have no moral or logical basis to restrict it to that arrangement.

I am sure that Kelly's friends are wonderful people and I hope that their children grow up healthy and well-developed. But what do as a society say to our children if we legalize gay marriage? Set aside the theological arguments for minute and consider: How Would Homosexual Marriage Hurt Children?*

If government endorses the idea that marriage is just a legal contract between consenting adults of any gender, regardless of procreative realities, then marriage will no longer be seen as a prerequisite for bearing and raising children. Marriage will be seen as nothing more than coupling. In fact, that’s exactly how many see marriage now.
If homosexual marriage is legalized — many more couples in our society will forgo traditional marriage and have more children out of wedlock. That will hurt children because illegitimate parents (there’s no such thing as illegitimate children) often never form a family, and those parents who simply live together break up at a rate two to three times that of married parents.
Are these just the hysterical warnings of an alarmist? No. We can look at the results in Norway, a country that has had homosexual marriage (without legal sanction) for about a decade. In Nordland, the most liberal county of Norway, where they fly gay “rainbow” flags over their churches, out-of-wedlock births have soared. In Nordland, more than 80 percent of women giving birth for the first time do so out of wedlock and nearly 70 percent of all children are born out of wedlock! Across the entire country of Norway, the out-of-wedlock birth rate rose from 39 percent in 1990 to 50 percent in 2000.
Social anthropologist Stanley Kurtz writes, “When we look at Nordland and Nord-Troendelag — the Vermont and Massachusetts of Norway — we are peering as far as we can into the future of marriage in a world where gay marriage is almost totally accepted. What we see is a place where marriage itself has almost totally disappeared.” Homosexual marriage is probably not solely responsible for this growing problem, but it is certainly a contributing factor. “Instead of encouraging a society-wide return to marriage,” says Kurtz, “Scandinavian gay marriage has driven home the message that marriage itself is outdated, and that virtually any family form, including out-of-wedlock parenthood, is acceptable.” When the entry standards for marriage are weakened to include same-sex couples, the perception of marriage will also be weakened; marriage and childbearing will just be considered incidental. That’s one reason why the number of illegitimate parents is exploding in Norway and it’s a major reason why we shouldn’t bring homosexual marriage to America.

I further submit the following: homosexual marriage isn’t really about civil rights, it’s about civil acceptance. Legalizing homosexual marriage is the one law that will legitimize homosexual behavior in general.

The law is a great teacher. Many people think that whatever is legal is moral and therefore should be accepted. One only needs to look at two of the most divisive issues in the history of our country — slavery and abortion — to see the power of the law to influence behavior and attitudes.

7.11.2006

The Big-Bang Story of U.S. Private Business

July 10, 2006, 7:44 a.m.The Big-Bang Story of U.S. Private BusinessThe economic power of lower-tax-rate incentives is once again working its magic.By Larry Kudlow
Did you know that just over the past 11 quarters, dating back to the June 2003 Bush tax cuts, America has increased the size of its entire economy by 20 percent? In less than three years, the U.S. economic pie has expanded by $2.2 trillion, an output add-on that is roughly the same size as the total Chinese economy, and much larger than the total economic size of nations like India, Mexico, Ireland, and Belgium.

This is an extraordinary fact, although you may be reading it here first. Most in the mainstream media would rather tout the faults of American capitalism than sing its praises. And of course, the media will almost always discuss supply-side tax cuts in negative terms, such as big budget deficits and static revenue losses. But here’s another suppressed fact: Since the 2003 tax cuts, tax-revenue collections from the expanding economy have been surging at double-digit rates while the deficit is constantly being revised downward.

For those who bother to look, the economic power of lower-tax-rate incentives is once again working its magic. While most reporters obsess about a mild slowdown in housing, the big-bang story is a high-sizzle pick-up in private business investment, which is directly traceable to Bush’s tax reform. It was private investment that was hardest hit in the early-decade stock market plunge and the aftermath of the 9/11 terrorist bombings. So team Bush’s wise men correctly targeted investment in order to slash the after-tax cost of capital and rejuvenate investment incentives.

The move paid off. Investors now keep nearly 50 percent more of their after-tax capital returns — an enormous increase that has resulted in a remarkably profitable and highly productive business sector. While the overall economy has grown by one-fifth since mid-2003, private business investment has expanded by 37 percent.

The dirty little secret here is that record low tax rates on capital are leading to continued job and income gains as businesses continue to expand. “But,” you might respond, “I thought job gains were soft.” Well, the marquis employment report for June may have showed “only” 121,000 new nonfarm payroll jobs, below Wall Street expectations. But this leads to another factoid that the mainstream media largely ignores: The household survey of job creation has been booming at a much faster clip than headline corporate payrolls. This survey shows 387,000 new jobs in June, following 288,000 in May.
When this last happened in 2003-04 (remember the “jobless recovery” election-year rant of Democrats?), it was corporate payrolls that caught up to the more entrepreneurial household survey — which more accurately records job creation by small-business owner/operators. This is the source of the bulk of American job creation.

According to the U.S. Small Business Administration, firms with less than 500 employees created 88 percent of the net new jobs in the U.S. between 1990 and 2003 (the last year for Census Bureau data). During this fourteen-year period, the share of total jobs created by small businesses was never less than 50 percent and was sometimes double the employment total.

Large corporations are reluctant to hire because it is so expensive to do so. Think health care and pension costs as well as payroll add-ons for unemployment compensation and worker disability. The modern cost-cutting pressures of globalization also force large firms to take a highly cautious hiring approach.

But newly minted entrepreneurs don’t face all these costs — at least not initially. And that is why the household survey has become so important in the 21st century economy.

Wages are rising today, so we know domestic labor markets must be tightening, not softening. To wit, average hourly compensation has risen to 3.9 percent over the past year, while average weekly earnings have grown to 4.5 percent. In early 2004 these wage measures were only 1.5 percent.

The June Labor report also revealed a 2.3 percent annual gain in aggregate hours worked — which is consistent with 3.7 percent real GDP growth and a 6.6 percent gain in wages and salaries. These hefty numbers will bolster consumer spending in the period ahead.

The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics is recognizing the importance of the small-business-driven household survey, and has suggested averaging household jobs with the corporate payroll survey to get a clearer jobs picture. Doing this yields a strong 186,000 new jobs per month over the past year, which is the key reason why the unemployment rate stands at a historically low 4.6 percent rate, with total employment not at a record high 144.5 million.

These data points hardly suggest a slumping economy. Instead they reveal a low-tax, durable, resilient, and flexible American market system that easily shifts from one sector (housing) to another (business investment). It is this American economic dynamism that separates our ongoing prosperity from the overtaxed and overregulated stutter-start stagnation of industrial economies in Western Europe and Japan.

Did someone say prosperity?
— Larry Kudlow, NRO’s Economics Editor, is host of CNBC’s Kudlow & Company and author of the daily web blog, Kudlow’s Money Politic$.
National Review Online - http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=NTVlZWE2NDQ3ZDkyMDA3ODhkNzIzOTNmOGRkMmYyYjM=